...

so,
sometimes i feel really crap about myself
like i just feel like a massive fuck up failure waste of space
but then
i remember that i've stopped 5 different people from killing themselves
and i feel like that is important
those five people could have killed themselves
but didnt
and i helped that
i helped them
and i feel like maybe im not such a waste after all
because i have plenty of time to make myself proud
and i helped make it so that those five kids have that chance too
and that can never be bad
so maybe im not so bad
and im excited to know that maybe i can work to save more lives
bring kids their dreams
because my dream has always been music
i've only changed my mind on which side of the stage i want to be on
so maybe i can take the kids like me
and even the ones who arent
and hand them the soundtrack to their dreams
as they sit in their bedrooms, just like I did
and dream of a future so much bigger than anyone could ever know
but they know they'll get there
with a few good friends
and a few good songs
for those times when only singing at the top of your lungs will make you feel better.
i look forward to that

oh, and just for the record yola.
I've found happiness
its different to what I expected
but I've found it
how cool is that?

thanks for always being there for me
I'd have never made it without you to talk to.