Browsing Archive: October, 2013
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, October 31, 2013,
I give my eart up too easily to people who dont want it
i trust people too quickly when they dont deserve it
you'd think ater all these years
after all these walls
after all the heart ache
i would have learnt
but it would seem i'm ust as stupid as before
im just as pathetic
and just as hopeless
why would anyone love me?
or like me?
i have no good qualities
unless being able to name and give excessive details about south korean celebrities counts as a good quality
because if so i fucking own th...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, October 28, 2013,
so i've actuallly had a really good couple of days.
like the times where I wasnt happy or busy have been heel i wont lie
i'm probably more depressed than usual
but i mean given the time of year its expected
i really fucking miss her
but yeah
good few days
yesterday i dyed my friend's hair black for him.
which was fun
like we havent hung out that much
and it was cool
and his family are really nice
and it was just good fun
and i did his makeup
for like a halloween test and he looked awesome
so yea...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, October 23, 2013,
I struggle
I struggle to wake up in the mornings
and goo to sleep at night
I stuggle leaving the house
and coming home
I struggle with what to wear
or if i want to wear it at all
I struggle with what i love
and who i am
and why that is
I struggle with who I love
and if anyone loves me too
I struggle with staying alive
and wanting to die
and everything inbetween
I struggle with stomach pain
and head aches
and not being able to breath
I struggle with too many pills
but not enough perscriptions ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, October 20, 2013,
Yesterday was a good day.
I went to carms with Dyl and Met alex on the bus so he hung out with us.
good times.
I thought I should mention that
Im not feeling great today.
That halloween party is filling me with more dread than I can bare.
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Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, October 19, 2013,
You know
its rare for me too plan ahead
aside from chidish daydreams
but one boy comes along
and I promise things weeks in advance
agree to things I would never
maybe it's good?
Maybe it's good im not crying over it being October and agreeing to do something with this year
But also
Maybe It's too soon
it's only been three years
and I was quite happy with my plan to stay inside and pretend the world didn't exist
but one stupid boy asks me if i'll go
and makes it sound like he actually wants me ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, October 18, 2013,
So, people actually read this now
and by people I mean more than the none I am used to
I'mm not sure what's changed
but it's weird
this used to just be me talking to myself
but now people are actually seeing this
for some unknown reason
like
im just a whiny teenager
why are you here??
read a book or some fanfic
speaking of fanfic
I write that now
lord knows why
And my most successful one has like 23 subscribers and like 800 views
which is pretty impressive to me
lord
I wonder if I know anyone t...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, October 16, 2013,
i cut
padi noticed
i cried
i feel crap
theres a boy
i like him
he wont ever like me
i agreed to dye his hair
i agreed to help him get ready for a halloween party
on the 30th
of october
the 30th
i agreed
because he ssaid please
I'm pathetic
Maybe i'll just help him get ready
I could do his makeup and go home
no need to see everyone and cry
everything is wrong
im a mess
fuck up
fuck
no boys
they just hurt
bye yola
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Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, October 15, 2013,
All I ever do is push people away
there was a nice boy
a boy who liked me
who asked me out on a date
who i said yes to
who i activly tried to scare away
and who's call I ignored
The boy might not be my type and he may have said the most wrong thing i have ever heard
but
he was a nice boy
and as soon as there might have been the slightest possibility o me having to get close to him
or start to trust him
i paniced
like actually crying
fucking terrified i might start to trust him and he'lll leave ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, October 12, 2013,
So yesterday
I broke down really quite badly
cause like I was supposed to be going over my nan's house to get help with my cv
but then she sent a text like an hour before she ws meant to come oover saying she wasn't going to be able to come till after two
bearing in mind we'd made this arrangement a week before hand
but yes
and I was tired
I hadn't slept because I knew I wouldn't want to wake up so i was extra emotional due to lack of sleep
but i just had had enough
People, esspecially her are ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, October 8, 2013,
As promised a post about Kim Heechul
What you must understand first off is that I am very new to being this much of a fan to Heechul
Like I have always liked him
he was one of the first members of SuJu that really caught my attention
And I really like Suju
even if their songs are dumb and embarassing most of the time
But recently (the past few months)
I have fallen in love with him
And he might possibly be my favorite person
Never mind kpop idol
I think he might just be my idol
he's pretty, there...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, October 8, 2013,
So I just figured out a thing
okay so fun fact about me
Sometimes I get really annoyed at the way adults behave around children
like i just cant stand it
And i think I just reasoned out one of those reasons
So like
Im manily going off what happens around my baby cousin here
but like
when I'm with her parents
Her parents will ASK for cuddles and kisses and that sort of thing
And if she doesn't want it, they're like "Okay"
But with the rest of my family
If they evenn bother to ask
they just do it...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, October 5, 2013,
I spend a lot of my life trying to convince myself i dont want to cut
I spend a lot of my life trying to convince myself im okay
I spend a lot of my life trying to tell myself there are reasons to stay
i spend most of my life not feeling okay
and people treat me as if this is a thing that happened because of my mothers death
but trust me i felt like this long before my mother even got ill
which is saying something because I was in year 8 when that happened
and I'm 17
in a few months i'll be 18...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, October 2, 2013,
Okay
so im not exactly happy right now
but nice things happened today
so documenting that is important
its pretty much the same as always tbf
skype call with gina and lucy and dawid (I'm sorry he changed his name on skype so now i cant even check to see how its spelt)
and had an amusing talk with Nickie about kpop
which ended up with me following his friend ashley on tumblr
and i think i offened a boy
but OH WELL!
So it was a nice evening of talking to people
so i felt i should just say that
b...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, October 1, 2013,
It amuses the fuck out of me that people still stumble across this and read it.
I'm just an angsty as fuck teenager with no other outlet (well fanfiction but that only really covers my need to be cute and cuddle with people)
but yes
todays topic
JOY!
lol no
but still
i've been thinking
like
what makes me happy,
what makes me feel good about myself
beside having fuckin rad hair
is being who I am
And comppleatly wearing that on my sleve
because thats just how I am
I will be reluctant to even tell y...
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