Browsing Archive: November, 2012
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, November 30, 2012,
God I have such big plans and such a long way to go
I was sat in the car coming baack from Aber tonight
And I was just thinking through it all
I have to leaarn to sew... like reaally well... within around two years
Which means, All money I have for the next two years Im going to have to spend on sewing and cosplaay
No cons,
I NEED to get fucking good
Aand Im terrified
Becaause what If I dont make it?
What if im not good enough?
What if my lack of being able to draw my designs out nicely holds me ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, November 29, 2012,
I hate kellie so much right now
Fucking fuck
Fucking WHY
Why would you do that?
I am the most awkward and fugly person I know my anxiety has been bad for days and all I wanted was a nice calm day at college to get back into it
But fucking no
Fuck you
FUCK
God I feel like a twat
And now he knows, or thinks he knows, because really there's nothing to know, because I dont like him AAND FUCK!
Why, why would you do such aa thing
I AM THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON EVER
WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT WAS A GOOD ID...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, November 28, 2012,
*sigh*
I miss mm
And I still like him
And Kellie is awful for this because she thinks she knows, which she does, but you know THATSSONOTTHEPOINTHERESHUTUPKELLIE
And im 17 in like... less than two weeks
and..
I have no friends to do anything with...and I kind of dont want to ask Kellie... cause it'd be awkward in the
"Why dont you hang out with your other friends?" Kind of way
So yeah "/
I maaay drag her out but not tell her its my birthd- fuck facebook
It'll be two days late its fine
*sigh*
Im su...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, November 27, 2012,
*sigh* i feel so fucking alone and so fucking scared im not going to make it to where i need to be.
and my head has decided this is the Perfect time to have crush's on people. because thats logical.
fuck.
help?
i need my mum.
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Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, November 26, 2012,
Seriously, If anyone has any ideas on how the fuck to stop liking someone thaat would be fucking grand because he is on my mind WAY too much and I can't fucking STAND it. TDFGHK
Its like just no
shut up brain
And I know obsessing over trying to get him off my mind wont help, but consciously trying to get him off my mind is better than him being subconsciously on my mind and coming up at weird moments T_T
my keyboard is so fucked T_T
HELP
I can not like him
Just no
fuck
Halp?
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Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, November 24, 2012,
This is driving me crazy!!!
fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
help?
fucking kellie i blame her for this T_T
help?
what do?
last time this happened... well we all know how that went down
hellllppppp T_T
welp back to merlin fics because thats the only thing keeping me sane right now
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Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, November 23, 2012,
Oh god oh god oh god oh god
PANIC
Hit the panic stations and then call for backup
I've done something stupid
Or rather let myself do something stupid
well
didn't let
its just sort of happened
But yeah
oh god
Fuck
Nope
no
I do
not
can
not
nope
I refuse
We've worked so hard for months not to let hopes be raised
There is no liking people
it ends in disappointment and hurt
Its stupid
stop it
nope nope nope nope nope
please go away
I cant
nope
oh dear god
we'll get over this, work around it, it'll be all g...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, November 22, 2012,
-sits being all weepy-
D:
I was already feeling tired and a tad miserable and was about to come and bitch on here then WHAM
CUTE JELLY POST!
And it was SO FUCKING SWEET
And then there were the usual "What do you identify as?" Questions to which Jenn answers Kelly-sexual which is just adorable and I love them and its so fucking cute And god damn
and its given me all the feels
considering
I am finally after months of being totally indifferent
Missing being in a relationship
I miss it
blerg
theres n...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, November 19, 2012,
Im heavier and fatter than I've ever been
Yet somehow I'm happier with my body and the way I look more than ever
I know why
Its because I admitted to myself all the stuff
oh for fuck sake
If I cant be honest on my own blog because some asshole is reading my blog now I dont see the point
Since I admitted to myself im bi-gender/ Androgynous (Im not sure which yet... Trans is still on the cards mind)
I've been happier, better and more at piece with myself cause im not constantly at war trying to...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, November 18, 2012,
Hey yoola
So good things again
Possibly cause im listening the best song ever
But yeah
Went to Carms with Kellie and Caroline yesterday
Was fun ^_^
Bought some comics and a cool tongue bar ^_^
But it was just nice
spending a normal day with friends
And like properly with friends
Friends that have someone they both think I'd be cute with
SHUTUPIDONTLIKECHRIS
I honestly dont but they're insistent its funny :L
But yush
Im happy
and Im talking to my tumblr peeps
In short im feelings a lot less alone ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, November 17, 2012,
WOW
I just legit surprised myself
So i was on tumblr... as I do
and There was the text post
that was like
"I hate it when you hear someone calling you but no one was actually calling you and you sit there confused as fuck for ages" And the post underneath said "Maybe its our loved ones trying to wake us from the coma we're in" And m head thought just calmly and then moved on..."Oh, I hope im not in a coma, im happy here"
wow
just fucking wow
Though today aside from being tiring as fuck has been ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, November 15, 2012,
my boots like lead below my feet my hair a shade of pink
i didnt even know a head could be
It shines in light and glows without aid, short and
styled and straightened and burned
My hair falls to pices just like my head.
This girl, big chested short and fat. I know her aswell
as I know myself
but thats wrong
because she is me
So I stare at her in the mirror
i look at the slanty eyes, crooked mouth, wide hips, big
chest, fat stomach, double chin, bright hair
And I ask
Well if you...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, November 14, 2012,
who the fuck are you?
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Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, November 14, 2012,
Fuck
Hey yola
i dont know
Im fucking sad all of a sudden
And my anxiety is up
SO JUST FUCK OKAY!
Do you remember when I used to say being alone was my worst fear...
Like I could deal with everything else
But being alone....
Was just too much
Turns out Im stronger than before
Because I haven't died yet
Havent even cut
But its getting to me yola
cause I literally have no one left
and no one I want to try to get back into my life
Jake is being a weird cunt at the moment and I cant talk to him
My ot...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, November 11, 2012,
Oh my god I'd written whole post but it got deleted. so fuck everything
FUCK THIS SHIT
It was posotive crap
why cant I have anything
god fucking damn it
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Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, November 11, 2012,
Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, November 11, 2012,
Woah holy shit fuck, someone's reading this again?
I've only just checked the site stats thing in weeks
WHO ARE YOU?
I didn't know anyone still knew this existed
wait what have I even posted recently?
Lord cat fuck
WHO ARE YOU?!
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Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, November 11, 2012,
Sup yola.
So
well
I dont want to talk about the other shit
I just
I dont get something
People say things to me, or online
Like
"no one wants me around"
Or
"Im never good enough for anyone"
But
They're always good enough to me, they always matter to me, and im never the person why leaves them, they leave me...
Its as if I dont count
Its as if my caring doesn't matter
Why is that?
I forgive people when I have no reason to
I listen and care about people that it makes no sense for me to care about, yet I...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, November 5, 2012,
Hey yola
So there are good things and bad things
Bad things
well as expected this week was shite
and I dont think next week will be much better
And i've lost several people who I thought were friends
And I came so close to selfharming this week.
did a good job of cutting my thumb open by accident, thats all though
Good things.
I feel things with me and Trin are good again. Like we dont talk all time but we do talk and she just, gah shes one of my best friends. and I love her.
Im going to buy fabric ...
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Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, November 1, 2012,
So be it
Goodbye
You've all hurt me for the last time
You wont hear from me again
Im only sorry I ever missed you
This is the last time
I dont need friends
I dont need you
I've gotten by better this year alone than I have with any of you there
I can't do it anymore
It hurts too much
so goodbye
I have sewing to concentrate on anyway.
I need a good portfolio if im going to go to uni.
Continue reading ...
