Browsing Archive: June, 2012
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 30, 2012,
Okay so ima write this. and then i'll probably get scared and delete it
Yup I deleted it
fucking coward
just say it you twat
if I put it all in one long worded sentence would anyone hold it against me?
No?
nope no cant do it
sorry s'just not happening
*this is three separate posts by the way*
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 30, 2012,
I am such an effing coward
I mean im going to have to tell people sooner or later
I dont want to
But ya know
its either I tell them, or awkward questions will start to pop up
Maybe I dont have to tell anyone
Its not like my friends ever invite me out with them or anything
or even talk to me
well thats a depressing thought
fuck it im going to watch more twin videos
He makes me feel better and him and Val are just... well they're pretty fucking amazing
and I WISH i had someone to go to Alcon with so I...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 30, 2012,
I've just realized something
Its been a week since everyone came round for the party/gathering whatever the fuck you wanna call it
Not one of them helped clean up
(well daisy did a bit)
And I havent heard from a single one of them
No thanks
no fucking anything
I got whined at for not bringing enough food/booze
Even though none of them brought anything (well daisy an dylan did but they werent moaning so they dont get included cause i like them)
And they got pissy when I dared be pissed off that t...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, June 29, 2012,
Hai yola. Busy day full of thinking loving my hair and finally getting paid
But in BIG news!!! ... *drum role* MY BELLY HASNT HURT FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT!!! LIKE AT ALL! FUCK YAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hapyy mothing fucking bean!
And yeah my hair. I love it so much!
Why was it not black before?
It looks like.. the best of all the hairs its been
and thats with it being too long and my fringe being awful
I want short and spiky!!!
Ands I got my moneys from my horse box ^_^ whi...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, June 28, 2012,
Hey yoolla ^_^ Im in a really good mood
I've been talking to Jake (best thing ever honestly)
My hair is now black! And it looks awesome! I fucking love it
Never not being black I have never loved a hair color this much
Or instantly known it was exactly perfect
Which is just epic
And I'vve been doing a lot of reading and video watching
and my mind fuckery is starting to make sense
And I've found some stuffs ima buy that'll help
Ah fuck it its yola I can tell you no one reads here
Basically ima bu...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, June 27, 2012,
Hey yola. So uh. After a lot of thinking tonight.. and well over the past..week or so (there's also been some of thinking done over the past two years) I've come to realize something.
I cant tell you yet.
because i want to give it time to make sure Its not just a spur of the moment thing.
It doesnt feel like it. I mean I'm more at peace with myself after realizing this than I have... well ever.
It feels and sounds right.
But its a big thing yola
So I dont wanna rush it
(she says knowing full well ...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, June 26, 2012,
Hey yola. I feel like I should be telling webs this. But that requires using google and remembering my unser name/password so you're going to have to live with the whiny.
Im so lost yola
Like
I hurt
But I also dont feel anything
And im so effing confused and scared about so many fucking things
But I also dont care
Or wish I didnt care
And I have moments where I think that things are gonna be alright
and then i spend hours panicking that thy never will be because im too fucking fucked up
And Im dep...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, June 25, 2012,
My head she is full of fuck.
I mean its not like we didn't have enough things going on in my head to drive me insane, and for me to worry and obsess over whenever it got quiet.
But no, according to my head we needed more fuckary. Cause what was already there wasn't enough.
Good
wonderful
And there is literally nothing I can do about this. Im just going to be sat thinking about it.
I really do hate my brain sometimes
Dont drink kids
well no I can hardly blame alcohol, this is all sober mes doing
Ef...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, June 24, 2012,
Okay so
Last night was awesome :L
My mind is saddly now full of fuck and I really honestly have no idea wtf to do T_T
I miss mam
Padi is a dick
Dan is an adorable drunk :3
Oh and im worried about people :L
OH and tickets to go see Tesseract came ^_^
so yeah thats that
buh byes
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 23, 2012,
Heys yoolla ^_^ sos tiz party night this evening xD
Drama already(fucking abi) But yeah. BOOZE LOTS AND LOTS! And al my friendlings ^_^ Im a happy bronnie thats trying not to think about how badly this could go or how awful this could be. I'll have Jess and Dylan. T'will be fine OH AND JADE! :D happy bean. Okays so yeah. Thats my day xD I'll be leaving soon to make sure I have a house and shizzle :L and make sure the freezer's on. so yah. Being a teenager for once.
Meh
who'm I kiddingg this is...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, June 21, 2012,
Evenan yoollla so as promised heres my bitch about how effing shite tonight was.
But before I get to that... It is fucking creepy how much Carrie-Ann (14) Flirts with people over the age of 20 and then they flirt back.... In a for realz type way, not in a Ahhh humor the small girl type way. Fucking creepy. I dont care how nice Ben is he's still 20 (ish) okay so after some stalking he was born in 1992 so he is 20. So theres a lovely 6 year age gap. Carrie hasnt even started her GCSE's yet and ...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, June 21, 2012,
Hey yola.. so i'll be going out any second now. Dont wanna go.... Ima be bad when I get home.... just a feeling.... so uh yeah... Im scared. I'll talk to you tonight yola. Look after yourself...
Guh byes x
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, June 20, 2012,
Goan to Jessies house ^_^ I am a happy bean right now. ^_^
Sorry I had a happy and I have decided that ima write them down no matter how small.
Happy ^_^ buh byes x
Oh yeah and Nick if you read this, Text if you need me, kays?
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, June 19, 2012,
I AM A GIANT BALL OF HAPPY OMFG SO MUCH HAPPY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
TRINFACE IS COMING HOMEEEE!!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (okay so its like for a day but still) And we're gona go round sams house and its gonna be eppppiiiiiccccc ahhhh best thing to wake up to ever! (yes
ye I did fall back to sleep, dont judge me I nev...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, June 18, 2012,
ever cared about someone so much it hurt?
Because it sucks.
**unrelated but equally short**
It occurs to me how utterly fucked up I am sometimes, this is one of those times.
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 16, 2012,
well it wasnt too awful... Im freezing and soaked and sad as fuck, but its not as bad as I thought it was going to be
Im mostly upset due to what me and Geoff talked about in the car once we were back.... I stupidly mentioned my lack of friends and never being able to/wanting to leave the house.... and of course my emoness .... so he spent a FOREVER telling me I need new friends, and need to go out, and need to ignore my anxiety, and I should go to the bunch and hang out with the young people ...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, June 15, 2012,
I dont wanna go... Yola... I cant go.... I mean I'll be coming home to an empty house... so there'll be no one to notice ANYTHING... and no need for me to stay quiet and in my room....
But I can't let Geoff down
He hasnt been up there yet
and he needs to go see her
they were in love for f's sake
Shes been gone a year and a half...
Its time he went
I cant let him down
But im so fucking scared
What do I do?
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, June 14, 2012,
YOLA YOLA YOLA!!!! HAPPY THERE ARE HAPPY THINGS!!!
I GOT INTO COLLEGE!!! AND ITS NOT ABER !!!! WOOOOOOOOOO :D
GOING TO DO CATERING!!!
AND
AND
MY HAPPY FROM YESTERDAY!!
I have friends and they are the best people ever!
And Thanks to Jades worrying, Dans mocking and Adams hugs yesterday was fucking awesome ^_^
So im HAPPYYYYYYY! :D
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Wednesday, June 13, 2012,
Fucking hell someone please make my belly stop hurting T_T THIS IS HORRIBLE!!!!! FYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
I have no fucking clue what to do with myself.... not that I can do anything cause even typing hurts! T_T ffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu (more chearfull post to come ^_^)
Prone to panic attacks... What helps my belly more than anything
else.... hyperventilation.... which then causes yet another panic
attack... Im fucked arent I? T_T
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, June 12, 2012,
Morning yola...
So I guess everythings been a bit shite recently... a lot for reasons already covered... but some for reasons im not quite sure of yet...
but today sucked ahaha.... I sucked in my exam, what with my dislexia and dyscalcula playing up....and I had my theory of having no friends proved a little bit further....
I'm loving naruto at the moment :3 and of course watching Twin and Nova.... its pretty sad when I realize they're pretty much the only thing making me happy these days ahah...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, June 8, 2012,
Hey yola.
I came here to write...
But I cant... I dont know what to say
*two hours of being pathetic...*
Welp, stopped crying now... like two hours later... so I think im good now ahaha :3
im not hungry at all but i fancy some food... so might try and see if theres any I want... but I've eaten today so its all good either way :3
Nighty night yola....
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Thursday, June 7, 2012,
words cannot describe how much of a bad mood im in.
Not even sure of the exact reason
Am just aware that EVERYTHING is pissing me the fuck off today.
oh joy more people talking to me
Excuse me while I go and comfort eat till I die.
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Tuesday, June 5, 2012,
You know what?
Fuck it
Fuck this
I tried so fucking hard with every single god damned one of you
I tired so hard to make you happy, to be there for you, to see past my problems as best I could so that they didnt cloud my judgment or make you feel bad/down
When you all started to drift away I did all I could to try and get you back, to get you to stay
Some may argue that I didnt do much...
But its scary... talking to anyone... even my best friends. and so saying hey to you .. while it doesn't seem yo...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, June 4, 2012,
Its mental yola... three days of not feeling alive...then one half hour nap and maybe a two minute chat with Sioned and Im efffing grand. well I suppose I was watching Twin and Yuna videos before i fell asleep and that always (unless im in a pathetic mood) Makes me happy.
But yeah, feeling a bit better now ahaha :3
so ima probably either read some more or do some more Twin and Yuna stalking... Ahh who'm I kidding its both and we know it :3
But yeah, that was a good thing that happened so I th...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, June 4, 2012,
Its weird yola.
I dont think I've ever told... anyone about this actually
But you see... I have this weird thing... and im not sure if its never mentioned because its normal or its weird hence why I've never head of it
But like sometimes when im touched on my arms, legs, pack or front (face very very occasionaly) It hurts more than holding your hand over an open flame while being kicked and stabbed. I mean granted thats when its REALLY bad... and normally it just huts on the backs of my arms a...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Monday, June 4, 2012,
morning yola. Im not sad or anything. I just... well I haven't really talked to anyone but myself in days. And I dont know how it is for other people... but after having a three hour conversation with yourself, is One, a little worrying :3 and two you get a bit bored of hearing your own voice.
But yeah, between reading and not having anyone to talk to me is making me mad. Like back when we were in Aus. Which I dont like cause that makes me think of then, which make me remember what time of yea...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Sunday, June 3, 2012,
Hey yola.
I feel weird.
I havent seen anyone in ages
and i dont really talk to anyone much either
I've just been sat reading
Like back in Australia
You know I hardly remember that month
I remember the rest of the holiday so clearly
But that end month all I remember doing is reading
Oh and nearly passing out from heat on some walk we went on
Im not so much depressed as numb
no not numb
empty?
I dont know
Its weird whatever it is
its kinda like being zoned out, but not....
fuck it
I cant decide if i mis...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 2, 2012,
This might actually be it yola... Im so much closer than ever before.
I dont really have anyone left who i would need to say goodbye to... no one will miss me.
Its been a good year yola.
goodnight
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Saturday, June 2, 2012,
*sigh* hey yola.
Tidied my room today.
haven't cut either. pretty proud of that
worried about Nick though... Not sure if hes not talking to me or is busy. I sent him a text earlier... But I don't wanna annoy him though so I'll leave it for today. I hope he's alright though.
Got some good news today! Uncle John has sold my horse box! so thats a nice £400 for me soon ^_^
Thinking of selling my guitar and drums too... if I do move out that is... I mean that'll be an extra £280 on top (200 for the ...
Continue reading ...
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, June 1, 2012,
feeling so alone tonight.
Continue reading ...
