A long ramble about my first cyc ressy.
Posted by bronwen wild on Friday, August 3, 2012
Heyy yooola again
So got back from the CYC ressy today
Was actually alright
The first night was .. bad
I was suicidal and miserable and REALLY wanted to just come home.
but yesterday was fun.
I made friends with a girl called Freya. whos pretty damn epic. shes 14 but really acts older.
And this guy Ryan whos awesome and JUST AS NERDY AS I AM!
like we sat all through yesterday just asking eachother if we like this or liked that and it was creepy how similar out likes were
And a guy called Caradog (I think thats how you spell it) Hes adorable I think hes around 13-14 and bless him hes so sweet.
It was pretty grate fun. We went bowling and I got to plushies from those grabby machines. a duck I named Paku And a Panda called Ichie.
I mean I did a fair bit of third wheeling mind. Cause Freya and Ryan were sorta ... well they're not together but they were kissing a fair bit and flirting. Which was fine and whatever... and they told me to stay in an earnest way... but yeeaaaahhh :L
Adam drove me crazy
And im getting pissed off with him and his constant coming on to me
I by no means mind a bit of joking around
and I dont mind when he gets all serious either
But there is a line
and he crossed it too many times
and just wouldn't back off
and it made me really uncomfortable
and I really didn't like it
And it also pissed me off that he made me come to the fucking ressy and aside from when he was bitching or being a lech i hardly saw him. cause he was off with Jamie. Fucking dick.
Oh well I met Freya. And shes cool!
We spent the last several hours talking about being unicorns and fairy wings and how of course I need a sex change mat smith is a gay and he needs to be my date to her wedding.
IM glad I went but im also glad i took my Diazapm with me.... I ended up going though nearly a whole pack.
And they were needed
We were all sat up away from everyone... and ryan came over to give me a hug and sat back and was like "are you scared you're heart is going really fast" And I sat and was like oh shit hes right... and said im fine... and made some excuse to go to my room took a pill went back and I was totally fine again. He even noticed it was quite sweet
I also realized I'd get on with those guys well, since I found out both of them have cut before (thankfully neither have a long while) And when I got worried about nicholas they said they'd help me kick his ass if he did anything stupid.
Im sorry for writing so much
Its just been a crazy three days
where I've made some cool friends
OH I didnt tell you about the worst part
yesterday
When I got changed in the morning somehow my necklace came off and i didnt notice untill a good while after. and I nearly cried in front of everyone and like had a mini full on panic attack. (I found it again) I wouldn't normally be so pathetic... but the night before I had a massive bout of I MISS MY MAMMY!!!!!!!!! D: As i do every once in a while... so the necklace loss was just like OH My FUCKING GOD NOOOOOO! D:
but yeah all is fine now.
ill shut up now xD
Buh bye yooola xx
So got back from the CYC ressy today
Was actually alright
The first night was .. bad
I was suicidal and miserable and REALLY wanted to just come home.
but yesterday was fun.
I made friends with a girl called Freya. whos pretty damn epic. shes 14 but really acts older.
And this guy Ryan whos awesome and JUST AS NERDY AS I AM!
like we sat all through yesterday just asking eachother if we like this or liked that and it was creepy how similar out likes were
And a guy called Caradog (I think thats how you spell it) Hes adorable I think hes around 13-14 and bless him hes so sweet.
It was pretty grate fun. We went bowling and I got to plushies from those grabby machines. a duck I named Paku And a Panda called Ichie.
I mean I did a fair bit of third wheeling mind. Cause Freya and Ryan were sorta ... well they're not together but they were kissing a fair bit and flirting. Which was fine and whatever... and they told me to stay in an earnest way... but yeeaaaahhh :L
Adam drove me crazy
And im getting pissed off with him and his constant coming on to me
I by no means mind a bit of joking around
and I dont mind when he gets all serious either
But there is a line
and he crossed it too many times
and just wouldn't back off
and it made me really uncomfortable
and I really didn't like it
And it also pissed me off that he made me come to the fucking ressy and aside from when he was bitching or being a lech i hardly saw him. cause he was off with Jamie. Fucking dick.
Oh well I met Freya. And shes cool!
We spent the last several hours talking about being unicorns and fairy wings and how of course I need a sex change mat smith is a gay and he needs to be my date to her wedding.
IM glad I went but im also glad i took my Diazapm with me.... I ended up going though nearly a whole pack.
And they were needed
We were all sat up away from everyone... and ryan came over to give me a hug and sat back and was like "are you scared you're heart is going really fast" And I sat and was like oh shit hes right... and said im fine... and made some excuse to go to my room took a pill went back and I was totally fine again. He even noticed it was quite sweet
I also realized I'd get on with those guys well, since I found out both of them have cut before (thankfully neither have a long while) And when I got worried about nicholas they said they'd help me kick his ass if he did anything stupid.
Im sorry for writing so much
Its just been a crazy three days
where I've made some cool friends
OH I didnt tell you about the worst part
yesterday
When I got changed in the morning somehow my necklace came off and i didnt notice untill a good while after. and I nearly cried in front of everyone and like had a mini full on panic attack. (I found it again) I wouldn't normally be so pathetic... but the night before I had a massive bout of I MISS MY MAMMY!!!!!!!!! D: As i do every once in a while... so the necklace loss was just like OH My FUCKING GOD NOOOOOO! D:
but yeah all is fine now.
ill shut up now xD
Buh bye yooola xx
