its nearly 3 am again, and here i am, feeling.... empty.... I guess.

I miss... love, being in love.... I miss her.... I miss the time before i fucked everything up....

I miss having people close to me who understand....

understand that this stuff isnt a choice, that if it was dont you think i'd choose not to?

I miss people who already know about me, so I dont have to see their faces or hear their "im sorries"

I miss having people who know about my belly, and who remind me to breath

I miss feeling okay and having a place where I feel safe

and most of the time I can keep it at bay...

but when the night time comes...

my head just wont shut up